Thursday, April 2
I am very happy. Today I have received a book I ordered only a few days ago. African Love Stories, an anthology of short stories, edited by Ama Ata Aidoo and published in 2006 at Ayebia. I've just read the introduction and it sounded auspicious. The fact that for most women, the reality often turned out to be more banal at best, and at worst, quite brutal than we could have ever imagined, never seemed to wake us up from the dream, tarnish its pristine attraction or the longing it kept burning in us...

Sunday, April 5
There is something I come across already in the first story, which is written by Leila Aboulela. It's about a christian man who converted to be a muslim. She writes about his parents: ...Ever since he had dropped out of medical school, they had feared for his well-being, fretted that he would be sucked up into unemployment, drugs, depression; the underworld that throbbed and dragged itself parallel to their active middle-class life... You know, that's why I like to be an artist. You are not to be classified, you are beyond classes, religions and politics. You can be yourself.

Wednesday, May 6
My father and some of my friends asked me what had happened to my diary. Why I hadn't written anything for almost a month. They were definitely right, I neglected my beloved diary. I often thought about, but nothing crucial came to my mind. It's cold and I am freezing. I miss Gambia. At least I have continued reading my African love stories. I really enjoyed and I could have quoted a lot of things. Here are two more samples: ...The Lawless by Sefi Atta: He had to ask Toyosi, since she had so many answers. 'I don't understand, a woman like you, why do you want to cook for a group of guys?' She frowned. 'I beg your pardon?' 'Aren't you for the liberation of women?...Toyosi shrugged. 'Why should I be for women's liberation? The person who chased my father and broke up my family is a woman. My mother herself, who threw me out of home, is a woman. Plus, what other skills do I have to offer a group of hungry guys?'...or Tropical Fish by Doreen Baingana: ...My worry that he was dying was quickly dispelled by his deep snores...I was wondering what I was doing there next to a white man. And why was it that men fell asleep so easily, so deeply, after huffing and puffing over you? There I was, awake, alone with my thoughts, loud in my head and never ending, like a ghost train. Sex was like school, something I just did. I mean, of course I wanted to; I took myself there, no one forced me...

And here something interesting about children and lying: Children who are younger than four are unable to lie. They are incapable to conceive that other people can have a different point of view from them. They assume that there exists only one point of view, which is their own. Whereas children who are older than four already have learned by experience that when they lie they can prevent awkward arguments and punishment for misdoing. But they haven't developed the theory of mind yet, which is necessary to understand why it works. That's why children in this stage of development sometimes tell outrageous and unbelievable lies. They lack the conceptual framework to judge whether a statement is believable, or even to understand the concept of believability.

Thursday, May 14
I feel heavy and slow. Every movement is a huge effort. Whereas people doing everything in a haste I have to take care not to get lost in thought. But I don't give up.

Sunday, May 31
A friend told me that I should comment my writing about lying. She didn't like it, considered it as to appear pseudo scientific. But my idea was'nt to be scientific at all. I found that theory about lying and how children develop the ability of it in wikipedia. It was just that I was surprised and wanted to communicate that very sophisticated phenomenon.

Monday, June 15
I first heard about Steve Mc Queen from my long term friend Ute Meta Bauer, who I know from artschool. When I was visiting documenta 11 in 2002 - she acted as co-curator of Okwui Enwezor - she told me about Mc Queen and his film Caribs' Leap/Western Deep. Naïve as I was I first thought of the Hollywood actor. At the same time I realised that couldn't be him at a documenta show focussing on Africa. However, when I watched his film on black workers' daily life in an South Afrcan goldmine with its very harsh conditions I thought since slavery there hadn't changed much. Yesterday, at Liste 09 I bought the art magazine Art Review, which includes an article about Mc Queen and his new film Hunger. The journalist states that Mc Queen's work is rather artistic than to be based on an antagonistic mindset, but that he finally went for "a fusion of both for tactical reasons: because overtly espousing a specific position is a way of asking to be classified and contained." (p.76) I would draft his way of thinking: you better understand life when you don't shut your eyes, just because you have selled yourself to a determined point of view.

Tuesday, June 30
Friends have asked me to join facebook. First I thought because I've got my own website why should I. Anyhow, I had heard a lot of talking about. For example that people by writing on walls could lose their job after, because nowadays employers use to snoop around in internet. Blablaba...
I already had opened up by pulishing my diary open for everybody. No registration, nothing. What then could happen to me down in facebook? Ok, one friend told me about feeling lost, because of not having a lot of friends. And I thought that could be a problem. You are there, but you don't find friends. I think I was afraid of exactly that happen to me. So I decided not to use my civil name, but Mimi Mofingo. After all, eventually inside facebook, I found out people were friendlier than I thought and somehow I regretted wearing a mask. On the other hand I got the opportunity to either uncover or to stay camouflaged. And I like Mimi Mofingo, it's a nice name. My second Gambian name after Sanneh.